I was always someone who didn't see myself having children, the mere thought of being responsible for someone else, someone tiny and incredibly reliant, always absolutely terrified me - and then I had a child.
People assume when you have a child you'll still be the same person, but I'm not and I know I'm not. The picture painted for most new mums is that of a disheveled shadow of a human, sleep deprived and miserable, completely unable to take time for herself. But I've definitely never felt this happy.
Becoming a mum to a tiny life really made me understand a lot of things I never had before. It made me understand when my Dad always said "it was worth it to see your big moon face looking back at me" - I used to think he was being a total Dad style sap, but now I fully understand how something so little can really make you feel so whole.
There are so many completely perfect things about having a baby. It's empowering. It's hard, and then you do it - and then for the rest of your life, you'll rarely doubt your ability to do anything. If that's not the best possible takeaway from an experience, I really don't know what is. The truest thing I can figure out from this little 7 days we've had together so far, is that attaining and maintaining happiness has a lot less to do with making the correct choices. It has more to do with cultivating the ability to handle change with all the courage, humility, curiosity, and amusement I can muster.
No one in the world is going to make the right decisions 100% of the time, or even feel entirely in control of the direction we go, but we absolutely can mould ourselves to become the type of people who embrace change rather than fear it. Whether it's having a child, or some other force, something will undoubtedly come along and move your life forward. Having a baby has moved my life in a direction I didn't even think was possible, like everything just fell right into place.
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